December 12, 2013 is a day that will forever be etched in my memory, for that day is the I married the sweetest man I have ever known. Jay and I had dated each other since July, 2003. We have already had a long journey together and now we get start a new leg of that journey as husband and wife.
Several years ago we decided when we did get married, we weren’t going to have the traditional wedding. We are both the second born in our families, so the pressure of have the big white wedding was eliminated. We didn’t want to have the traditional wedding, but at the same time we didn’t want to get married at the courthouse. We started brainstorming on where and what type of ceremony we wanted. We decided we wanted our wedding to be an intimate affair with no guest list. After that decision was made we knew we would have to have a getaway type wedding. If we traveled far enough away, we would minimize the hurt feelings of our friends and relatives for not inviting them to be a part of our day.
Off and on for the two years we were engaged we would come up with ideas on what we wanted in a wedding, neither of us taking it too seriously. Then this year we discovered we would actually have the excess funds to be able to afford it. By late August 2013, we decided since we had the funds and the want to make our love official, we were going to get married by the end of the year. Thus set in motion the frenzy of planning and scheming and keeping nearly everyone out of the loop.
I am not exactly sure when the decision was made, but early in September it was decided we were going to have our ceremony at a bed and breakfast in Maine. We got in contact with a bed and breakfast in Rockland, ME, they had a decent all included package deal. A few emails were exchanged and it looked like it was going to be easy.
The last week of September, Jay was staying at a friend and co-worker’s house a couple of nights a week so it was an easier drive to work for him. I was planning on meeting up with him for dinner. He called to let me know they were going to be working a little later than normal. I had approximately two hours to waste from the time I got off work until he got back to our friend’s house. I decided that I would go browse wedding dresses. I went to a wedding shop and looked at the dresses on the rack. I tried on 5 dresses. I really like one dress it was ivory with blue corset and blue flowers sewn on the skirt. I decided I check the big box shop of wedding dresses. I drove down the road to David’s Bridal. It was a nightmare! I went back to first wedding shop and tried on the dress I liked and one other I saw upon returning. Both dresses were beautiful, I wasn’t sure which on I wanted. I asked the ladies helping me try them on and they actually picked the cheaper dress, which made me believe it looked better. I tried on a total of six dresses before I chose the one.
Early November we had still not heard back from the bed and breakfast on a confirmation. I started getting a little worried, we were only a few weeks away. We started looking at other options. We ended up looking for an officiate thinking that was going to be the hardest part of the planning. I found Janice at Hitch Maine on http://www.weddingwire.com. She was absolutely fantastic. She sent us multiple samples of ceremonies she had performed in the past to give us ideas on what we wanted. Jay and I ended up pulling a few passages from hers, and some from a spiritual ceremony, but our vows were mostly Buddhist in origin. We sent the final version of the ceremony to her about two weeks before we departed. We eventually found a different Bed & Breakfast in Portland that given the length of the ceremony and we were going to be staying there wouldn’t charge us the event fee.
Before we left a few select people knew the ultimate reason for our vacation. I had a hard time not telling one of my best friends about our plans, she ended up being my support when I just couldn’t keep the plans to myself. It was really difficult trying to keep it a secret, we were both so excited. We spent the beginning of the week taking our time getting to Portland and had a blast with unplanned events and destinations along the way. During the 10 years of being together Jay and I have had precious little time to take vacations. Mainly due to living across the country from our families we only had taken our vacations to visit family.
Our wedding ceremony was beautiful. We only had one issue during the whole ceremony. The wedding took place in the breakfast hall at the Bed & Breakfast in the evening. We moved the tables and set up the camera up. During the set up there was no music playing, but once we started the ceremony Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer started playing in the background. We started laughing during the ceremony. It has now been a joke between everyone we have told about the experience. Every time we heard the song over Christmas we both started laughing so hard.
I am so happy we decided to have our wedding with just the two of us. We weren’t stressed and have fond memories of the entire day.